by Kimberley Thompson, Tastemaker in Residence

I have been asked to write about how I feel about the New Year as it is just a couple of days away. (In reality, Cindi reached out to me several days ago.) Feeling luxuriously languid this season, I procrastinated until Weds evening. Yikes.

No need to say this year is different. There isn't a single word, phrase, paragraph, or book that will ever truly address all that has happened this year. World, country, state, county, city, street, and homes were all impacted and changed. Even those that have the luxury of money weren't immune.

Soul searching is my usual fare about this time of year; I rather feel it is a requirement in my adult life. "Each year, reflect, review, resolve, and rejoice at midnight Dec 31st." The mind's quiet voices start murmuring it at the start of the holiday season. Those voices grow in intensity and fervor as the ball drop grows closer. I cannot recall not having a pensive time to sit down and ponder my life: where it had been and where was it going.

I was prepared to do that this year: the writing down of thoughts, good moments and bad, on little slips of paper to burn in the fireplace at midnight, releasing the power of the words into ashes to disappear from my life or to seal my promises to myself. Sending my written prayers to God along with my burdens via the twining tendrils of woodsmoke.

Believe me, I LIKED my own relatively unshakeable little world...until the light shed by the year 2020! I was basically happy, secure, and loved. I was content taking peeks at the rest of the world, the places I would love to visit, the foods I would like to try and the seas I would love to sail. But I am afraid I cannot be content with just my lot in life anymore. 2020 ripped off that blindfold.

So, I thought this would be an easy, quick, may-be even quippy little thought to write. Turn back time, go back to normal, take a mulligan, wear a t-shirt that states, "I survived 2020."

Crap.

We, meaning all of us, are going to have to work harder than ever in 2021 so we DO NOT FORGET the bitter lessons and the good take-aways... So that the difficult conversations do not slide in the footnote sections where no one reads them (but your editor wants them to protect the publishing house from legal issues). We will eventually have to take off the masks and look each other in the eye and be willing to listen, discuss, learn, and compromise.

We also need to keep the good that came out of 2020: more family time, actually having conversations, helping neighbors, thanking people who made our lives safer and healthier. Spending less time in our vehicles and more time walking neighborhoods and parks. Adopting shelter pets. Valuing the elderly and the very young by acting like adults and staying masked. Asking hard questions. Expecting accountability.

Disraeli said, "Change is inevitable. Change is constant."

Going forward, I plan to be intensely aware of my consumerism tendencies and attempt to ratchet them back down to a livable level of accumulation. I am not saying that I will never buy something again just because I want it...but I can examine the whys of why I want it. I can become less wasteful and more mindful of my shopping habits. I know that having the ability to buy things that help me feel content (for the time being) in my little nest isn't necessarily a trait to be proud of...but I have learned the joys of donating some of my feathers to charities so someone else's nest can be "feathered" feels even better! I can purchase WASHABLE masks!

Practice empathy daily...this will be harder on me. I tend to get dismissive regarding other people's emotions especially if I think there is no basis for their feelings. Yes, I will still practice tough love on those thoughtless enough to think the world owes them a living...my Father did not raise foolish children...we were all accountable. But stopping to ask "are you okay?" and then waiting for and HEARING the answer is something 2020 taught all of us. (Masks do not cover the ears!)

Plan to "see." Look, really look, at people. We exist in a judgmental world...one fueled by politics, the media, both the left and right-wingers and religions. How easy it is to judge a person by what they wear, who they worship, their zip code, the diplomas on their walls, the balance in their accounts, and what they drive. We even judge by the physical "beauty" of the person...when that is so ephemeral at best. See a person...warts and all...see their VALUE. (Masks do not cover our eyes!)

Remember my actions speak louder than words. That is an unchanging universal truth. Am I a "hanger-on," or do I put my time, money, and work into that which I support? Do I stay out of uncomfortable conversations, or just mumble platitudes as I walk away because I am "busy?" (And no, I am not talking about toxic conversations that everyone should run like hell to get away from...and the toxic relationships that breed them!) (Masks do not hinder our limbs from being a volunteer or writing a check.)

So, no promises to exercise every day...that only lasts me about 4 weeks.

No swearing off sugar...that last me about 3 weeks.

Giving up caffeine...those of you who know me would be right is estimating that to last about 1 week. (And none of you would want to be around me!)

I guess masks have been a necessity in more ways than one...they keep us from talking...and encourage us to listen.

Kimberley's New Year Soul Searching & Masked Musings